How to Say No

When you are looking to meet someone you will probably find that along the way you are going to have to say no to some people. This will be easy if they have not really made an effort and have sent a generic ‘Hi’ to hundreds of people, but if they have been kind to you, then it can make things harder.

Here is how to say no to someone in a kind, but firm way.

Saying no to a message

If someone has taken the time to send you a message, it is only polite to respond to them to tell them that you don’t think that you would make a good match for them. Use a simple rejection without going into detail about why you are not interested, as this might give them the opportunity to retaliate.

Saying no to a second date

If your date didn’t go well, then hopefully it will not come as too much of a surprise if you tell them that you don’t want to go for a second date. However, the problem comes if you appeared to get on really well, but you just didn’t feel a spark. If this is the case, then it is good to let them know as soon as possible so that they are not pinning their hopes on you. At this stage, it is not a good idea to offer to be friends, unless that really is your intention in the long run.

Once again, ignoring them is not a good idea as it will upset them further and will not give them closure. The kindest thing is to make a phone call, but if you can’t face that, then a message will be enough.

Saying no after a few dates

When you have been dating for a while, you will know for sure how you feel about them. At this point you will probably have discussed your dreams and goals and will know if your date fits into your future. At this stage it is unfair to send them a message to say that you want to end the relationship. It is customary to tell the person face-to-face.