North Yorkshire couple enjoy a decade of muddy love

A decade on from mutually connecting on Muddy Matches, farmer love is still in full bloom for mud lovers, Helen and Tom.

How do you measure the success of a first date?
Is it a feeling of instant, mutual attraction? The crackle of chemistry at the slightest touch? Or even the immediate comfort and reassurance in their company?

For mud-lovers Helen and Tom, their yardstick to a successful first date was when the bar staff at their pub of choice had to intervene, such was the flow of conversation as they bonded over shared interests and common ground.

“They were kicking us out for closing time. We’d talked all night,” Helen tells us as she recalls her ‘brilliant’ first date with 90% muddy gamekeeper – and farmer’s son – Tom.

The pair had met whilst online dating with Muddy Matches in August 2011. Tom was 6-months single, and more versed in the Muddy Matches swing of things when they mutually connected.

Despite venturing into new territory, it was farmer’s daughter Helen who’d make the first move inviting Tom for ‘tea n’ drink’ whilst they spent time messaging back and forth about fishing trips, farming backgrounds, flat pack furniture, shooting days and dehorning calves.

“It was my first time online dating; a friend was telling me about Muddy Matches as I’d just split from a long term relationship. I thought it was a good idea as I liked the idea of meeting like minded people.” Helen adds.

“Tom looked my type and sounded like the person for me. We both love the outdoors, walking the dogs and shooting so I sent Tom a message. It really was very easy and it went from there.”

Almost a decade later, they have come a long way from that first date in a well known high street pub chain in Thirsk that Helen had chosen to ‘avoid all the questions’ that would have come from friends of friends if meeting for the first time in her ‘local’.

“We are now married with a 4-year-old little boy. We got engaged on my birthday in 2013 in the Lake District and married in February 2014 at Burn Hall. We now live together in Fadmoor, near York.

“When we met I lived near Thirsk and Tom, who’s originally from a village called Halsham near Hull, lived on the North Yorkshire Moors; it was a good 50 minutes traveling.”

As for the muddiest thing the duo do on a daily basis? For Helen and Tom, their rural roots are ever present; it’s a good day’s beating in the rain, and going for walks – and the pair cannot wait for lockdown to end so they can head to the Lakes for ‘a long weekend away’ and explore plans for a visit to New Zealand.

Like many muddy singletons though, lockdown in the countryside has been more ‘business as usual’ compared to the experience of those that live a life less rural.

“It didn’t really change for us. We are very lucky to live where we live” Helen adds. “I carried on going to work and going to the farm as we were lambing through the first lockdown at the beginning, so did Tom. Our little boy was at home through the first one but started school in September.”

And when it comes to advice to other mud-inspired couples hoping for a happy, lasting muddy marriage, Helen believes in striking a healthy blend of own time and time together whilst being sure to have fun whatever ups and downs life together throws at you.